greetings from Montana…
holy big sky! and big mountains! i just spent the day driving from Spokane, WA through 2 mountain passes in the northern tip of Idaho and on to Missoula which is a cozy little city nestled in the arms of stunning mountain peaks just about everywhere you look. this is my very first time in MT and i already can’t wait to come back!
now i’m down to only 8 states that i’ve never been to. here’s where i stand:
Hawaii- any one want to host me in a house concert and fly me in? i’ll play in exchange for travel and room and board
Alaska- i wanna go there in the summer when it’s daylight 24 hours a day. i hear instead of the sun rising and setting it just rotates around the horizon…weird!
Colorado- my bro is moving to Boulder soon to train in the mountains, he’s a professional cyclist a la Lance, so i’m sure i’ll knock that one off my list soon when i go visit him
Wyoming- would love to spend a couple weeks in a cabin there writing…
Nebraska- seems like an underdog of the states, i hardly know a thing about Nebraska except that in fourth grade i memorized that Lincoln is the capital
South Dakota- i’ve been to North Dakota so is there really a reason to check out its southern counterpart? this coming from a born and bred North Carolinian. i’m sure our southern neighbors wouldn’t appreciate that kinda tude!
New Mexico- played in Mexico but not New Mexico. i wanna go there and see an armadillo!
Mississippi- don’t know how i missed this one since i’ve been to all the states that sandwich it in. does it count that i’ve crossed the Mississippi River like 30 times in 5 or so different places?
i’m in my usual quandry this time of year…what to be for Halloween, oh the agony! i’m not one of those girls who uses Halloween as an excuse to bear excessive amounts of skin by being a belly dancer or a mermaid with pasties or something. so obnoxious. if you wanna be slutty, just own it and be slutty year-round, kay? one recent year i complained to my friend/brilliant songwriter, Adrianne, that i needed a last minute costume. apparently she’s a brilliant Halloween costume designer too cause she pulled a one-of-a-kind idea out of her arse. she said i could carry around a small pumpkin and a hammer and when someone asked me what i was i could start hammering on the pumkin and tell them i was “Smashing Pumpkins”. it was so much fun! lil bit messy tho. sometimes you gotta suffer for fashion you know? i’m kinda tempted to be Meredith Grey from Grey’s Anatomy cause people keep telling me she reminds them of me, but then i’d have to wear scrubs and that wouldn’t be too sexy now would it? do scrubs come in spandex? that would be sexy! not 
if anyone has a great Halloween costume idea, please email me!
got a few random rants and raves…
rave: The Prestige. best movie i’ve seen in a really long time. we talked about it for hours trying to decide exactly what had really gone down once we knew the final twist. you gotta see this movie!
rant: skinny-leg jeans. can we please leave this look in the 80’s where it belongs? only preteen punks look good in those pants. i really hope they’re not going to bring back the ankle zippers on jeans too. or matching your red scrunchy socks with your red baggy sweater with acid washed skinny-leg jeans and keds. or big bangs, please don’t bring back the hair hopper big bangs! that’s a sore spot for me. i don’t want to have to be reminded of middle school trauma. the short story is that i’ve never had bangs and my twin sister, Laura, always had bangs when we were growing up. Laura-bangs, Kyler-no-bangs. it was one of the ways people told us apart. in middle school we road the bus home from downtown Raleigh out to the countryside with a bunch of hicks who decided they liked Laura much better than me because she had big sprayed up bangs and i didn’t. i was a social lepper just because of a few missing fringes in front. i’ve gotten over it by now, really, but please don’t bring back the big bangs or the skinny-leg jeans!
rave: prunes. no really, they’re freakin’ good! everyone always associates them with unpleasant digestive problems but they’re just dried plums for gosh sakes! i’ve been eating them like candy lately along with dates which are yummy but i have no idea what dried fruit they are. what the heck is a date anyways?
rant: macho guys calling other guys “pussy” to insult their courage and manliness. if i have to hear one more guy insult female anatomy…#%$@^&$!!! listen guys, women can give birth *and* have mulitple orgasms…can you say that? take a look at yourselves and think twice next time. i have a new word for you that’s way more accurate and synonymous with wimpy…try “limpy” on for size! (ok, i feel better now)
rave: Montana!!!
until next time,
kyler 